You might run into your next-door neighbor nearly every day, exchanging a few words about the weather as you roll the trash and recycling bins to the curb. You may think of them as a friend, or at least feel familiar with the rhythms of their day to day life.

When people talk about legacy, they often think about what gets passed down like an inheritance, a house, or a few meaningful objects someone promises to keep forever.

When something unexpected happens, families move quickly. Calls are made. Appointments are scheduled. Decisions cannot wait. 

Most families don’t avoid end-of-life planning because they don’t care. They avoid it because they do.

Most people do not avoid legacy planning because they do not care. They avoid it because it feels premature. "I'm not there yet." "We'll figure it out when the time comes." "There's still time."

Most emergencies are not planned. But the stress surrounding them often is. “I’ll deal with it later” is one of the most common responses to emergency planning. It feels reasonable. Life is busy. Nothing feels urgent. There will be time.

Maybe it starts with sporadic phone calls that subtly increase in frequency and urgency. Reminders to take medications that become reminders to leave for appointments. Troubleshooting how to get to the grocery store when the weather gets cold that becomes troubleshooting how to leave the house at all. It can be a slow burn, a subtle creep.

A question that’s on your mind late at night. A form you don’t quite understand. A growing list of things that you know need your attention, but you don’t know how to prioritize them all. In these instances, the impulse is often to turn to the internet.